Mosquitoes, The Cypriot Way!

Do you know what the problem is with the mosquitoes over here? They have a BAD attitude.

The mosquitoes back in the UK were much tamer than they are here. The UK mozzies almost had a laid back attitude, as if they’d spent a bit too long in a beer garden and were a little pissed!

They’d come over, try and sting your arm or leg and you’d shoo it away and that would be the end of the story. The Cypriot mozzies are much more ruthless. They sneak up on you. You can hear them, they want you to hear them. They come right up to your ear and yell “I’m here!” and you swing round quickly but no mozzie. Now you know they are near. You grab the swatter and scour the room for the Cypriot mosquito, nothing. It’s in stealth mode. It comes up behind you again straight in your ear, “you’ll never catch me” it buzzes. You swing round and again it’s nowhere to be seen. You start to itch, its bitten you already and you had no idea. This is how sneaky the mozzies are over here. They warn you they are going to attack you then absolutely annihilate your body. (Last year I had 17 bites in one day.) When you do finally locate the mosquito its usually huge. A mutant Cypriot mosquito filled with your blood. If you ever do outsmart the buggers over here and manage to send one to its demise, a huge sense of pride and achievement fills your body. It must be what hunters feel like!

Someone once said why didn’t Noah squash the 2 mosquitoes instead of letting them on the Arc! I have to admit, I love all God’s creatures and see that they all have a purpose…even spiders but mozzies? What purpose do they actually serve?

Last night I got bitten on my eyelid….my eyelid!!  The Cypriot way of the mosquito is to embarrass as well as cause pain. It had the option of my whole face as a meal and it chose my eyelid. It’s as if they know what will cause the most discomfort. Today I look like the elephant woman. The Cypriot way of the mosquito is to be a ninja. Yes the Cypriot mozzies are ruthless, fast, sometimes invisible & won’t hesitate to bite you on the ass! You have been warned, if you see or hear a Cypriot mosquito, be prepared, make sure you’re armed and alert. They don’t take any prisoners!